Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Im tellin ya,
Kids these days are maturing too fast.
Yeah, so i might sound like some old ah-soh, but its true.

When i was 11, i thought Mary Hopkins belting out "Those Were The Days" on my father's "The Greatest Oldies 4" was the coolest thing on the Green Earth.

These days, 11 year olds know exactly what a blow job is.

If you'd asked me that when i was 11, i'd probably have said something like "its what the people in the salon do to your hair after they wash it!" Or something stupid like that.


And American kids have their hormones all out of whack too.

Like this kid at the Peter Pan drama.
She was about 6.

Girl: For my birthday, ah always wanted to go to Hollywood.

Friend: (who looked 5) Yeeeahhh! I wanna live in Beverly Hills and be a model who eats a grain of rice everyday, and pukes it out anyway. I wanna be like those sticks on TV, who backstab and scorn each other. I wanna be famous and marry a handsome, rich movie star!

Yeah. She didnt say all the Beverly Hill crap, but she did say she wanted to be FAMOUS AND MARRY A HANDSOME RICH MOVIE STAR.

Which i find absolutely unnerving, considering they are around the age where i still HAD PROBLEMS INVOLVING milk from bottles and peeing ..

But still! These kinda thoughts normally come to an average kid when they are about 12.

When i was 5, i wanted to marry a Prince, i wanted to be like the kids in Secrets of Droon who went into magical rooms and Magic Tree Houses. I wanted to kiss my elbow too see if i turned into a boy. I wanted to go camping, with rifles and guns with fantastical enchanted flutes. I wanted to be in the tent with my cookie monster and blankie.

I wanted to be happy, like a normal, 5 year old kids in Fantasy Land.

Incidentally, i had no idea what a Great Movie Star was. Neither did my mates, cause all we did all day was condition Barbie's hair, and had car races and conqured make believe villains and played "Kens who wore forever-stuck-on-beach-shorts marrying Barbies who wore forever-stuck-on-bikinis."

THEY'RE GROWING UP TOO FAST, I TELL YOU.
TOO FAST!


Phooey.
I'm gonna finish ALL my holiday homework by the end of this week! 'Magine the freeeeedom after that!

*Sigh*

As long as im dreaming, i want a younger version of Leonardo Decaprio with jet black hair with a funny and happy personality to make me laugh. And marry me. And not have a divorce after a few years, because we start to piss each other off, but lovelovelove each other till we die.

As long as im dreaming, that is.


THOSE WERE DAYS MY FRIEND
WE'D THOUGHT THEY'D NEVER END
-Those Were The Days. Mary Hopkins.

Monday, October 29, 2007

All mixed up in my head about what to take for Subj Combi.

So im not a very good decision maker.
I STILL DONT SEE WHY PEOPLE TAKE THIS SO LIGHTLY.

Gosh, i have no mood.

Anyway,
my brother makes a not-so-good Peter Pan.
Its amusing, really.

Muah.

IM SLIM SHADY
WONT THE REAL SLIM SHADY
PLEASE STAND UP
-The Real Slim Shady. Eminem

Thursday, October 25, 2007

Today i sit in the bus, and look out the window.

Buses with advertisements, taxis with advertisements, buildings with advertisements, shirts with advertisements, and yeah yeah yeah.

All the swingy hair females, and stand-up-lie-down-drop-dead-gorgeous, hunky male models, (like those Boss ads, sweeeet) plastered all over everywhere, every corner, every way you turn.

Its no wonder we all feel self conscious, no?
Ho.

Oh hear this.

:

A fisherman sits and smiles at the beautiful scenery and enjoys the cool sea breeze. A passerby walks pass.

Passerby: Why dont you catch some fish?

Fisherman: Why should i?

Passerby: Because if you do, then you can earn more money.

Fisherman: Whatever for?

Passerby: So, you can enjoy life, and be sit around all day and be comfortable. You can relax all day, and be a happy, fulfilled man.

Fisherman: What do you think im doing now?


Yeah.
Don't you think its the weirdest little story on earth?
It does put your life into a little perspective.

Can you believe i learn more from my CHINESE COMPRE PASSAGES than some of those so-called-inspirational book. Trust me, i read loads of them. Most of them load a pile of useless rubbish you already know into your head, and you get more confused and everything.

Course, there are a few wayyy cool ones.


URGENT.
BUY
SNG
FIESTA
TICKETS
FROM
ME!

FROM ME.
Hurry hurry hurry.
Tell me if you wanna come.

CAUSE MAYBE
YOURE GONNA BE THE ONE
THAT SAVES ME
Wonderwall. Oasis.

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

I AM CARA ♥

PILATAES DAYAYEAYE .
moving on
met a crazy woman at NTUC today.
started talking to herself suddenly.
OHOHS.
i need to tell you about amanda blankety.(or rag)
BLOOPS .

im really bored.
TAG MORE FOR OUR DEAR DEAR BROWN .


♥♥♥

Saturday, October 20, 2007

BIRTHDAY SONG

As part of my birthday present to my dear friend CARA for being a great birthday girl, i have composed a song for her.

It goes:

"Na na na na na na na
Na na na na naaaaaaa
Caraaaaaaaaa
Na na na nana na na na
Na na na na na na na"

Yeah.
Plus it totally suits her because she loves singing weird-made up tunes. So, the Na-na-nas go with anything.

A total plus, is the rhyming.
Innit cool!?
I didnt think it would rhyme so exquisitely.

CALL ME BARNEY.
BARNEY'S SONGWRITER.

Anyway.
I was gonna blog about the joys of cereal but im too bored.
Too bad.

Sigh,
we now will observe a moment of silence in respect for Madeline L'enge's death. The SECOND BEST ALL TIME AMAZING AUTHORS EVER WHO WROTE ALL MY FAVOURITE BOOKS.

I cant believe she's gone.
She'll never write again.

Ever.
Bah, its so sad i cant even think about it.

*sniff*

Go eat your sobert you weird little people.
Sobertsobertsobertsobert.

WE LOVE SOBERT.

Thursday, October 18, 2007

I was walking home today, and the park looked eerily impending and creepy.

I kept thinking of all those rape/murder articles in the newspapers.
Freaking out. Freaking out. Freaking out.

So i was thinking about what to do if i actually got ambushed.


To make sure my friends have these safety precautions in mind, i have compiled a few things to remember if you get attacked.

1. If you hear rustling bushes, DUCK.
WHY? They always strike from the side, and wonk you out with a huge merciless bat. And when you're out cold , you're as-good-as-dead. (although if they wanna rape you on the spot, they'll probably want you conscious. heh, sorry, just a side note.)

2. Try pretending you're a martial arts expert.
WHY? Then hopefully, after you strike a fake KungFu pose, youre attacker would get freaked out and get cold feet.

3. SCREAM.
WHY? Go figure.

4. Kick and scream.
Why? To get loose. Then RUN LIKE YOU'VE NEVER RUN BEFORE.


IF THERE ARE MORE THAN ONE ATTACKERS.

1. If surrounded, drop to your knees and crawl between one of their legs, and RUN. Then you keep running till you reach someone. Saved.

But you can't run faster than the perverts, trip over a rock and (only as a last resort) PLAY DEAD.

(Frankly, it would be better to have ketchup on hand 24/7, but since this is ultimately not possible, you just have to pretend you died from the fall.)

-End of "Guide to Getting Away (100% un-tested, Use at Own Risk)"-

Yeah well.
So its not very explicit.

But whos says im the pro at these things away.

Heh.

SHE BROKE MY HEART
I WANNA BE SEDATED
-Girl All The Bad Guys Want. Bowling For Soup.

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

Poof.
Im not a birthday-ish person.

Its just so upsetting, i dont know how to get things for other people. I buy totally silly things.

Yknow, my brother covers his ears when we sing the birthday song for him?
Its so cute.
Haha, hes so embarrased when he's center attention.



Now-i-have-to-go-do-math.
Poop.

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

The Wrong Books

In books, the girl and boy always meet in some elevator.
Then they'll meet someplace else.
Then, most of the time they find they fancy each other and dadadeedum, and off they riding into the sunset.

Something like-

Boy: I've seen you in the elevator.
Girl: Yeah whatever, i like you too.
*kiss*

Most of the time its something like that, only dragged out into a looong and unnecessarily pleasurable story.

But nothing like that happens in real life, does it?
NUH UH UH.

It doesnt. It doesnt. IT DOESNT. BARH. (Ohh. I hear Bugs Life. Love that show. Flick's like saying something about the colony and the bird and stuff)

You can meet some sweet guy in the elevator, and then *ding* and he's gone. You know you'll never see him again. So there. Boo for you, ha.

IM JUST SAYING IT HYPOTHETICALLY.
So i figure its either im 1, doing something wrong with my life, or 2, reading the wrong books.

I choose 2, because its easier to solve.




Moving on.

Okay?
I REALLY REALLY REALLY LIKE 'ME LOVE' by KINGSTON, his voice. Wheehoo. Been listening for like, 3 weeks non stop already. Not sick yet.

Lovelovelove it.
Why-why-you leave me.
I FEEL LIKE IM DROWNING IN THE OCEAN.

I just love it.
Dont you?

His voice is just so, SEX-AYE.
Really, deep and childish and stuff. I dunno, it just has some edge and appeal. Ser can do the imitation like real good. Its seriously amazing. NO KIDDING.

I WATCHED PRIDE AND PREJEDICE. In-Love-With-Darcy.

Now im freaaaaked about gettin into ah- JC.
(From Bing's comments. I'll say, that girl who was ranting in his page was RAWR , some tigeress.)

Ahwell.
I havent done work for like, 5 days.
I feel disgusting, my brain is collasping.
BUT HAHA IM FREE!

And plus, all those O'leveling now, push on, yeh?
DONT GIVVIT UP!
THINK AH WHATS AFTER IT ALL.

Goodness, im scared for them.
'Magine when its my turn.

Cant wait.


B-B-B-BABY I THINK IM GOING
C-C-C-CRAZY
WHY SHOULD I BE SANE
WITHOUT YOU
-Never be Lonely. The Feeling

Saturday, October 13, 2007

David.

He's that guy in the Bible.
He's that guy who shot the Goliath down.

He's that guy who IS THE SWEETEST LITTLE BOY ON EARTH.

Really.
David was this ubber angelic little kid i met today.
Everyone there was littler than 8, and they were all guys.

I was the rose among the thorns.
Heh.

ROSE AMONG THE THORNS.
Me.

DAVID
Anyway.
So David has these gorgeous, appealing-beautiful eyes, deep as the never-ending depths of the ocean. He's rapture, he's angelic, he's TO-DIE-FOR, THE CHARMING, HANDSOME DAZZALING BOY.

He has a sort of refined, uh, reserved and yknow, he's just so arresting.

Muah.

Really. His eyes are the most amazing ever. Shining, and swimming and bright.



There are so many children with so many different kinda personailties. Lets say, my brother. Hes DA LADIEE'S MAN.

All the girls his age are like, head over heels for him. (Unfortunately for them, he doesnt care)

"I hate girls"

My brother is also 7, and he is crazy, outgoing and always the center of attention, always speaking his mind, and always being is happy, mad, animated self.


DAVID, on the other hand, is a oblivious to people, hes running around most of the time, in his own little world. Curious eyes peering all over the place, finding things no one else knew about.

For example, today there were these bunch of beautiful flowers near the roof. The other guys were playing "hunt" inside, but David was outside looking around.

"Jie jie! Follow me please?"
(How can my weak personality resist such a plea?)

We wandered around, and David told me to look at the "pweety fluvwers". I told him There arent any, darlin'

Then i realised there were, up there on the roof.
And they were 'pweety' all right.

David, the observant, dashing boy with a Face Of Adonis and Eyes Like the Sea. beautiful and quiet. He quite reminds me of Francine.

They both are unnervingly STOIC.
Something i have been aiming to be since i knew that such a word exsisted.

Stoic: unaffected, indifferent; restrained

Sadly, im far from it.
Pleh.

YOU'RE SO HARDCORE.

Thursday, October 11, 2007

Today's Urban was the cooowlest.

The sexx-aye must-see underwear model.
Oh well, i really didnt know there were so many kinda underwears for men.

But now the first thing imma ask guys is "do you wear Jock-straps" and if they do i'll know that they are freaky, and i wont beable to stop thinking about that, and then i'll be really disgusted the whole time.

And that means we cant be friends because i'll be too preoccupied by the whole perverse-ness of it.

EUGRH.

Putting it simply,
JOCK-STRAPS ARE SICK.

I didnt actually know there was such an obscene undie thing for men, it like a manly G-string, just doesnt give you wedgies and everything.

Considering i hate G-strings, i hate jock straps.
Its so gay its freaky.



A brief (HAHAH sorr for the pun) intro on jockstraps.
They look something like a uhh-ehh, well i dunno.
If you take the normal undie and cut two huge holes at the place where the butt is supposed to be, and there you have it.

A jock-strap.

Yeah well, go read Urban today.
Unnervingly strange.

Movin on.
Today we went ice-skating and all da guys were like hitting on Nel cause she was wearing her skating leotard with this subber short skirt and the leggings, and she looked SWEEEET.

Plus she had her own skates, and she skated like a pro. Mainly, because she is a pro.

When i say hitting i do mean really hitting, or bumping. Whichever, cause there was this horizontally challenged boy, and he kept looking at her, and finally plucked the guts to go and accidentally-on-purpose knock onto her.

He failed though.
(what a loser,
sorry, but REALLY you poor boy)

HA. I always suceed when i try. BOO YOU.

Then i was dragging Serlin around, and shes like a worm i tellya, she wobbles like anything. Its funny. The in the end i fell on her and she neeeearly got herself a concussion, which might have been a good thing considering TRAINING BEGINS TOMORROW.


"kill me, please"


It is so EURGH-ISH because the form said it was starting next Wed, and I HAVE FREAKING PLANS. Well not really, but i am going to have FREAKING PLANS.

Anyway, i need to visit Francine cuz i have to see her play tennis with her boy-friends.

"Not boyfriends, mind you."

(thats what everybody says)


AND FRANCINE LIVES REALLY CLOSE TA'ME.

Its cool.

ZEN AND JAYYYYY!!!
Lovelove,

AND NOT just because of their ULTRA MEGATRONICAL cool names, also because they are sweet little sweeties, who are beautiful-cute but from Catholic High.

Not like i have anything against Cat High.
Really.

I WANNA GO WATCH THE ISLAND.
The cool clone show.

See ya.

EVERYONE LOVES EVCERYONE

Monday, October 08, 2007

Ive one word to sum-it-all-up.

FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM.

Saturday, October 06, 2007

Ah well.


Yoga.
After reading all those creepy sites about how yoga is all cult-ish and un-Godly, i have decided to stop doin' it. That was really fast, considering i only started 4 days ago.

Sigh,
just when i thought i've found some way to stay fit whist sitting down and not movin' much. NOW ALL I HAVE IS RUNNING.

*Sniff*

Oh well then, today i read Reader's Digest about the plane crash 204, and parents who kill their own 2month old kids by backing their cars onto them, and not realising the "little hump" they have rolled over is their kid.

I was sittin there crying my eyes out for like, half an hour. (WELL SORRY I WASNT DOING MY CHINESE, BUT ITS ISNT AS FUN AS YOU WOULD THINK IT IS.)

I was sobbing and sniffing and everything, and i felt so mushy. Its just so sad how people do these kinda things, and it really makes you question why they happen.

And thats a stupid question too, because questioning such things is such being idiotic.

Because you know you wont get much of an answer or anything, so it completely defeats the whole purpose of it anyway.

BARH.

So, ive decided that people die for a reason. No sense in questioning why. Just leave it up to God. And everything.

Oh boy, but LEMME JUST TELL YOU, the stories were REEEAAALLY touching. I dont cry easy, oh-kay? They were so pathetically sad, so upsettingly down-age. It makes you wanna shrivel up because you're like all

"GOD, FORGIVE ME FOR BEING SO LUCKY"

because there are people out there who have lost their husbands in airplane-wrecks on their honeymoon (imagine the devastation) and their little 2 year old kids.

And the surreal suffocating guilt a father must be feeling after he runs over his beautiful, beloved child.

Its just so , so so, so sad.

Which makes me feel all guilty again.

AHWELL.
The trick is to do something about it. No sense mooching around about it yeah?
SO YKNOW WHAT, IM GONNA HAVE TO TELL EVERYONE I KNOW TO CHECK BEFORE THEY REVERSE.

Pass it on. Really.
Maybe you'll make a difference.

"Go forth and multiply."

ONE LAST CALL FOR ALCOHOL
SO FINISH YOUR WHISKY
OR BEER
-Closing Time. Semisonic

Friday, October 05, 2007

I DONT BELIEVE IT!

Malaysia and Indonesia are fighting over a FREAKING SONG!

Dont believe it.
Dont believe it.

SERIOUSLY DONT BELIEVE IT.

Rasa Sayang.

(I always thought it was called "Rasa Sayang Eh"

Yknow it goes something like,
"Rasa Sayang Eh
Rasa sayang sayang EH"

I still remember listening to that, i loved it! I used to watch the Teletubbies Singalong vids, they used to show the song, and i used to sing along too.

But that was a long time ago when people didnt think Teletubbies were a bunch of eerie freaks and got so stupidly scared of them.

DOES MALAYSIA AND INDONESIA HAVE NOTHING ELSE BETTER TO DO THAN FIGHT OVER A SONG WHICH BABIES SING ALONG TO!!??

Ptooeyy.
I wipe my hand of these rubbish.

Moving on, to more interesting and happy things (because our world is filled with so much more joyous beginnings and sweet endings.)

Word of The Day:
Prevalent
Meaning: Common

Oh plus, i have a new obsession. Actually A FEW new obsessions.

1. Yoga
2."Walking on Sunshine"(Katrina and the Waves version)
3. HAKUNA MATATA
4. Cute With Chris- Show.
5. Podcasts!!! (of almost everything)
6. BEING A HAPPY PERSON.

Yeah.
Yoga is a cool hobby. If you think about it, its better than most sports because you wont get like BULGING DISGUSTING MANLY leg or arm muscles, just a cool lean bo-daye.

So it hurts like crap sometimes, but who cares, its kinda cool anyway.

And your balance improves, and you can relax and and you become a more calm and collected person. WHOA, like cool or what.

Watch CUTE WITH CHRIS.
He's probably the most un-cute guys i've ever seen, his slams are the scariest things ever, BUT HES MEGATRONICALLY FUNNY.

Really. His stupid talking horse and pet animals are the weirdest things ever. I was hooked for like over 30 episodes. ITS THE FUNNIEST THIANG EV-VAH.

Really really.
Go here to watch http://www.cutewithchris.com//

So well.
Heh.

I go cycling with Srn to-day too.
She has no bike and thus she freeloads off the back of mine.

I've never rode anyone before and its scary as anything.
Sirin grabs my waist for her life.

We remind her of the lesbian movie she watched of Rainie Yang and a butch. So she grips my shoulder instead.

IT MEANS NO WORRIES
FOR THE REST OF YOUR DAYS!
ITS A PROBLEM FREE
PHILOSOPHY
-Hakuna Matata. Lion King

Tuesday, October 02, 2007

Today we dedicate for our dear friend
Christy C.

A child of pure mind and heart, Please, give her comfort. Please. Please please please.

Thank you.

And the 2 things we learnt today:

1. Move fast. (Smash and throw.eg Serlin)


2. Shit happens.

It does, you know.
We just have to move on.

And thats life for you.